Month 13 (9)

After telling Amelia I’d go back to sleep and sending her away, I lay down on the bed, but as expected, sleep wouldn’t come.

It wasn’t that I wasn’t tired. I had already had a deep sleep once. It was just that, lately, I hadn’t been able to fall asleep properly at night.

During the day, I could keep myself busy and somehow let the time fly by, but at night, that wasn’t possible. Whenever night fell, my head would fill with complicated thoughts.

So today, too, I let out a sigh and stepped outside, beginning my usual walk around the sanctuary.

Despite it being the final night of the festival, the sanctuary was still noisy.

“BETHELRAAAAAAA!!”

“Gwahahahaha!”

As I headed in the opposite direction to avoid the barbarians’ roars, my feet naturally led me to the place I always ended up.

Perhaps they were another reason I kept finding myself coming here.

The cold winds of the thirteenth month swept past, brushing against my skin.

I stopped walking and looked up at the sky. A crescent moon hung there.

Whenever I looked at it, I felt like I was on Earth, yet at the same time it reminded me that I wasn’t.

For a very simple reason.

If you look closely, its shape is slightly different…

‘There are no full moons in Raphdonia.’

No matter when you look up at the night sky, you see the same moon, all year round.

It’s not that the full moon never appeared. It was just extremely rare – something like a total solar eclipse on Earth.

I’m not an astronomer, so I had no idea why it happened, and honestly, it wasn’t something I cared to figure out in this magical, mystical world.

Step.

“Who is it?”

My voice came out sharper than intended, and a barbarian warrior stepped out of the forest, scratching the back of his head in embarrassment.

When I saw who it was, I couldn’t hide my surprise.

“You’re… Vecta, the third son of Kiltau?”

At least it wasn’t Baek-ho, which eased my tension somewhat, though I hadn’t expected to run into him like this.

“Oh! I didn’t think you’d remember my name! It’s an honor, Chief!!” he exclaimed, shouting into the quiet night, clearly moved that I had called him by name.

Well, considering the barbarian way, it wasn’t something to criticize.

Since our paths had crossed by chance, I decided to strike up a conversation with him.

“Of course I should remember. You are the warrior who defeated me, after all.”

“…Haha!! Chief, if you drink like I do, you’ll be able to drink even better!!”

No, let’s not go that far… If I did that, rumors would spread throughout the city that Baron Jandel wet himself while drinking.

“So, why were you here?”

“…Khehe!! This is where my house will be built, so I came here early!!”

“…What?”

“I’m finally getting a house, so I was too excited to sleep! I’m going to live here until the house is finished! Because this is my house now!!”

“Uh… I see. But why did you choose this spot? This is near the graveyard…”

“It’s just nice and cool here!!”

The longer we talked, the more I felt like I was losing to him somehow. I started to wonder if I had misunderstood this guy all along.

‘Is he really from the modern age?’

Perhaps those evil spirit hunters from the secret police had felt the same way when they looked at me. Since they hadn’t seen me struggle during the coming-of-age ceremony and only knew me as I am now, it probably wouldn’t even occur to them that I might be an evil spirit.

“Ah, by the way, did you choose the shield during your coming-of-age ceremony?”

“Oh! I did! I didn’t think you’d remember that too! I’m honored!”

“So? Are you still using it?”

“I threw it away and use an axe now! I chose a shield because you did, Chief, but it didn’t suit me!”

“You chose it because of me?”

“Bjorn, son of Jandel, is the greatest warrior of all time! I wanted to follow in your footsteps! Well… getting the right essences were too hard, so I gave up!”

What a strange guy. How could someone who’d opened his eyes during the coming-of-age ceremony even know who I was?

I smirked as I looked down at Vekta.

‘Still… he’s definitely a player.’

After talking a bit more, it became clear. Though honestly, as someone from the same modern world, it was a bit embarrassing to admit.

‘…I used to be like that too.’

Of course, I don’t mean the philosophy of duality.

There was a time when I acted just like Vecta, always being tense around the chief and trying even harder to act like a barbarian.

We didn’t talk for long, but I had a hunch. This guy will live a long life.

That level of complete immersion into a barbarian persona, and the instinct to exploit situations for gain—guys like this don’t die easily.

“But what brings the Chief here? Ah, were you going to the cemetery again?”

“Not really. Just on patrol.”

“Oh! I see. Good work! I’m hungry, so I’m going to sleep a little longer!”

He seemed to want to send me off, but I had no intention of leaving yet.

“I’ll give you some jerky, so let’s talk a bit.”

“…R-Really?! Thank you!! As expected, the Chief is a great and wise warrior!!”

That slight hesitation cost a few points, but yeah, this was enough to pass as a barbarian act.

“So, what did you want to talk about…?”

Vekta asked, clearly trying to draw out more information.

He acted like a thoughtless barbarian, but he was clearly curious.

I couldn’t blame him. I’d suddenly struck up a conversation out of nowhere. It was only natural for him to feel uneasy and wary of my intentions.

“Well, nothing much. I wanted to hear about your troubles.”

“…My troubles?”

He looked confused.

Instead of sharing my own troubles with him, I was offering my counsel—counsel he hadn’t even asked for.

“Tell me! What troubles do you have?”

“I don’t really have any…”

“That’s impossible! Everyone has troubles! Tell me! As the Chief, I have the right to hear it!”

“…The right?”

“…Right?”

Don’t you mean ‘duty’? I felt like I could hear those unspoken words, but it wasn’t important, so I passed over it.

Vecta gave me a strange look. I didn’t know for sure, but it felt like he was thinking, ‘So this chief really is a true barbarian…’

To be honest, I felt a bit ridiculous myself. I didn’t want to get that kind of look from a guy who’d wet his pants while drinking.

“Ahem! Anyway, speak!”

“…”

“…Alright!”

When I barked at him with the authority of the Tribe Chief, troubles started flowing from Vecta’s mouth.

“…I do have a concern. About a friend.”

“Oh? What kind of friend?”

“A human teammate I worked with on the same team before the labyrinth closed. Hans Elibern…”

“What?”

“Wait, why are you so surprised? Do you know him?”

“No, I just felt like saying it. So what’s up with this friend?”

“I met him in the city a while ago, and he said there’s a good opportunity this time, and asked if I wanted to start a business together—”

“Don’t do it.”

“…Huh? I haven’t even explained what the opportunity is—”

What opportunity?

Is this guy stupid? Working with Hans?

“If I say don’t do it, don’t do it.”

I even added killing intent to intimidate him.

Vekta nodded blankly.

“Okay! I won’t do it!”

Good. Should’ve done that earlier.

“…But can you at least tell me why?”

“The name sounds ominous.”

He looked at me like, what the hell is wrong with this guy?

But only for a moment.

Which meant I didn’t need to care.

“Alright, that’s your first concern solved. Now tell me the second.”

“…Second? I don’t have one…”

“No, you definitely do.”

“…Money? It’s hard to earn lately—”

“That’s not a real concern.”

“Then what am I supposed to say—”

After I pressed him a little harder, Vekta finally let out a sigh of relief as he racked his brain. Perhaps he realized he needed to say something to move the conversation forward. Fortunately, when he finally spoke, what he brought up next was far more worth exploring.

“…I wish the labyrinth would open soon.”

“That’s not what I meant by a real concern.”

“That’s not it. I want to become stronger. This war made me feel that even more.”

“…Explain.”

“…Many of my fellow warriors died in this war. If I had been stronger, I could have protected them.”

Hearing his clumsy but sincere words, I nodded quietly.
As I’d suspected, the house was only an excuse. He had been lingering around the burial grounds, just like me.
“…It’s not your fault you couldn’t protect them.”

“I know. It’s a world where everyone has to survive on their own. I just… regret it. If they were still alive, we would’ve laughed and celebrated together at this festival.”

“We always wanted a house.”

“And now you have one.”

“Yeah. I’ll have one soon. But now… there’s no one to show it to.”

I don’t know for sure, but a thought suddenly occurred to me. Perhaps… perhaps this was why he drank until he wet himself. Maybe that’s why he endured it somehow, even though he wanted to give up and felt like collapsing right then and there.

“…That’s my second concern.”

“I see.”

After letting out his true feelings, Vekta looked somewhat relieved.

“What should I do…? Tell me, Chief.”

There was faint hope in his eyes.

Hope that I might give him a clear answer.

So I did.

“Make new friends.”

“…What?”

“And become stronger. So you won’t lose them again.”

“That settles your second concern. Now I’ll be going. I’m hungry!”

After helping to resolve the concerns of a novice warrior I had encountered by chance, I felt a little lighter as I headed towards my destination.

***
The cold wind howled, sending dried leaves rustling into the air.

In the past, the barbarians believed that what they were seeing were the spirits of their fallen warriors who had become heroic souls and were now sparring and playing with one another.

This way of thinking was surprisingly poetic and metaphorical — something uncharacteristic of barbarians.

Barbarians didn’t bury their dead. Instead, they practiced what was known as sky burial, leaving the bodies to be scattered by wind and rain until nothing remained.

[Brown Rotmiller]
[Versyl Gowland]
[James Carla]

Tonight, as always, I stood before the graves of the three of them.

I hoped to find an answer that might ease the tightness in my chest.

Of course, standing here wouldn’t make any answers simply appear.

This world is wrong.

Whether it’s Earth or Raphdonia, now that I think about it, they’re not all that different.

Perhaps that’s simply the natural order of things, but that doesn’t change the fact that it’s wrong.

Humans, barbarians, beastpeople, or fairies—

[I know that too. It’s a world where everyone has to survive on their own.]

A world where survival is all that matters.

I’m sick of it—

And in that moment, I realized something.

What it is I truly want.

I don’t want to merely survive day by day—I want to live.

Together with the people I cherish.

Heh.

Of course, it’s nothing more than a wish, and some cynic might sneer at it, asking where such a gentle world could possibly exist.

But so what?

I’m a barbarian.

If my teeth broke, I’ll chew with my gums.

If something’s wrong with my head, I’ll fix it.

If I feel like shouting, I’ll just shout.

There’s no need to overthink it. This is no different.

If such a world doesn’t exist, then I’ll make it.

‘Looks like I’ve got a lot to do.’

Sitting before the gravestones, sketching out plans bordering on delusion, I suddenly heard a roar of cheers and glanced at the time.

Tick.

Yeah, I’d already figured as much from how loud they were.

[00:00]

At last, the long, trouble-filled year had finally come to an end.

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